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  • Writer's pictureBrand Baha

How to Win Any Argument on Social Media: How To Troll A Troll

In the grand coliseum of social media, where opinions clash and keyboards are mightier than swords...


Grand Coliseum of Digital Debate: An imaginative digital coliseum made of code and emojis, featuring two warriors ready for a humorous social media duel, surrounded by cheering social media icons.

Chapter 1: The Art of Profile Sleuthing

Do:


Casually browse your opponent's profile to understand their likes, dislikes, and, most importantly, their embarrassing old posts. 


It's like gathering ammo before the duel. 


Imagine noticing they've shared three different articles from dubious sources in the past. 


Cue your opening: "Loved your diverse sources, especially the one from 'I Make Stuff Up Daily'. Adds a lot of... depth."*


Don’t:


Dive so deep that you accidentally like a photo from 2009. 


That's not reconnaissance; that's just creepy.


re-Debate Preparations: Two social media users in a digital lounge, one scrolling through an opponent's profile on a giant smartphone, and the other crafting a witty comment on a floating virtual keyboard, surrounded by thought bubbles.

Chapter 2: Your algorithm is you


Do: 


Acknowledge that we're all in some sort of echo chamber. 


Use it to your advantage by predicting their arguments based on their most recent follows and likes. 

If they've been binge-sharing a certain political pundit, prep your counterarguments accordingly.*

Don’t:

Assume you're immune to the echo chamber effect. That's the first sign you're deep in one.

Research in Whimsical Library: A debater in detective gear surrounded by books, articles, and digital devices, researching facts and statistics with highlighted papers and pie charts floating around in a warm, inviting library setting.


Chapter 3: The Screenshot Jab

Do: 


Keep a handy collection of screenshots for when you need to quote someone's previous contradictory statements. 


It's the digital "Gotcha!" 


When they flip-flop on an issue, present a beautifully captioned screenshot from two weeks ago, Just strolling down memory lane... 🤔


Don’t:


Use screenshots out of context. 


Cafe Banter Over Sarcasm: Social media users in a lively cafe setting, engaging in playful banter with one crafting a sarcastic comment on a tablet, surrounded by emojis and speech bubbles, in a cozy digital atmosphere.

Chapter 4: Meme Warfare Do: 


Use memes as your shield and sword. 


They're perfect for lightening the mood or making a pointed statement without typing a single word. 


Choose a meme of a famous person side-eyeing for when their arguments start to sound shaky.*


 Don’t:


Rely solely on memes. 


Digital Art Gallery of Memes: Visitors in a vibrant digital art gallery admiring memes that encapsulate social media arguments, with one avatar uploading a meme and receiving likes, in a community-filled, creative environment.

Chapter 5: The Graceful Exit


 Do:


Know when to bow out gracefully. If the argument starts going in circles, drop a polite "Agree to disagree" and move on. 


Bonus points for a classy exit meme.*


 Don’t:


Leave with a passive-aggressive parting shot. It's tempting, but resist the urge to comment, "Enjoy your bubble!" as you exit.


Serene Park Digital Detox: Digital avatars taking a break in a serene park with virtual benches, digital paths, and trees with emoji leaves, emphasizing the balance between digital engagement and real-world peace.

Chapter 6: The Unfollow/Follow Paradox


 Do: 


Consider if this argument is worth an unfollow or block. 


Sometimes, peace of mind is more valuable than getting the last word in.

   

Don’t:


Make a big show out of unfollowing or blocking. Just do it quietly. Announcing it just adds to the drama.

Epic Mic Drop Moment: A confident digital avatar performing a mic drop on a virtual stage, with an audience of avatars and emojis reacting with admiration and surprise, highlighted by digital confetti and like symbols.

A Personal Story: Some old high school friends now divided by their love and hate for pineapple on pizza. Jamie, a pineapple enthusiast, dives into Alex's profile, armed with wit and a mission to prove the supremacy of fruity pizza toppings. They notice Alex recently liked a "Pineapple on Pizza Hate Group" and prepare their opening salvo.


Seeing you've joined the culinary dark side with that hate group, Jamie comments on Alex's latest anti-pineapple rant, attaching a meme of Gordon Ramsay looking disappointedly at a pizza without pineapple. Alex fires back with a screenshot from 2010 where Jamie swore off pineapple after a bad fruit pizza experience.


The exchange escalates with more memes, playful jabs at each other's past culinary missteps, and finally ends with both acknowledging the ridiculousness of the argument. Jamie posts a final meme of two cartoon pizzas holding hands, captioned "Differences aside, we're still good."


Playful Debate Over Pineapple on Pizza: Jamie and Alex as digital avatars in a vibrant landscape, debating pineapple on pizza with a pineapple shield and tomato sauce cannon, with a scoreboard and an eager emoji audience.

This playful skirmish showcases the real essence of social media arguments: it's not about changing minds but about the interaction, the banter, and sometimes, just keeping the boredom at bay. Remember, at the end of the day, it's not about winning—it's about how you play the game.

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